How to Recognize and Survive a Toxic Leader

Sten Swenson, Director of IT, North Carolina State University

Personal lives. Your supervisor can determine how you spend your time, what opportunities are available, how you’re seen by others in the organization and your access to resources. These issues are not confined to your work life, and can impact you and your family in significant ways.

Consistent exposure to toxic leadership can leave you feeling low, unmotivated, confused and helpless. So, what does toxic leadership look like in action and what can you do when you find yourself impacted by it?

For the purposes of this article, I’m using toxic with a lowercase t, realizing it's a buzz word and that there are many formal models, which I’m not referring to. My definition is based on personal observations and refers to leaders that are unprofessional, unsupportive and foster a workplace that is predicated on fear and control.

A toxic leader uses fear to maintain authority and will make you feel humiliated and demoralized, as long as it suits their purpose. Good leaders “praise in public and coach in private”, while toxic leaders belittle you in front of your peers and partners, behaving unprofessionally when things don’t go their way. In this environment there’s no room for disagreement, and employees often say “yes” to avoid conflict. Cliques and favoritism emerge and opportunities are offered based on loyalty instead of merit or strategic priorities. These leaders are often micromanagers, overly involved in the details of your work due to a lack of trust in others and fear of losing control. Instead of setting clear goals that can be judged objectively, they provide muddy direction that can be changed at will and offer subjective criticism to suit their immediate purpose. It's not an isolated issue however. Since culture is self-reinforcing and the leader sets the tone, this bad behavior seeps through the organization and has major impacts on productivity and job satisfaction.

If you find yourself in a toxic environment, it may be best to leave, however, that's not always easy or possible. Here are some concrete steps you can take to help you manage the situation.

Talk to HR: In an ideal world, you could be honest with your manager or report your interactions to HR, but that may not be realistic or safe. Even if you decide not to report the situation, you should still schedule time with your HR team to find out what your options are.

Stick to Your Values: You may be tempted or encouraged to join in the toxic culture that your boss has created, but you don’t have to. Fall back on your core values when you feel pressured to behave in ways that are out of alignment with your instincts.

Keep a Cool Head: During tense interactions with your manager, stay calm and professional and don’t react to their bad behavior in a way that will put you at risk.

Get Back to Basics: Consider limiting your professional risk taking and sticking to your work plan closely. Remember to document anything you think could be relevant if the situation turns into a formal performance issue.

Lean on your Network: Spend time reinforcing your network, building support and finding positive interactions to increase your confidence and offset the negative atmosphere.

Invest in Yourself: Don’t be afraid to invest in professional development opportunities that will help you take the next step in your career.

Having a toxic leader can be mentally exhausting and it's important to remember that it's not your fault. It may be hard to believe that professionals can act in these ways, and you likely feel alone and isolated if you’ve become a target, and that's the point.

Your primary responsibility is to take care of yourself, and you should make sure you’re taking advantage of employee support resources wherever possible and seeking professional help when you need it. Be strong and don’t give up hope. If you’re applying for jobs, be patient with yourself and know that the process can be long and drawn out, especially in Higher Ed.

If you’re currently experiencing a toxic work culture, I feel for you and wish you the best in finding your way through safely. My hope is that you’re able to get to the other side stronger and with a clearer idea of what kind of leader you want to work for and what kind of leader you want to be.

HR